For quite some time, I have been following a blog written by Rick DuFour on Caring Bridge. His blog chronicled his battle with lung cancer. Rick's writing and wisdom has always impressed me, and his writing about this awful illness was no different. I was always amazed at his ability to use this experience to continue teaching. His words always touched me. This past week, I opened the site to read his latest post, and this is what appeared on the page:
Journal entry by Becky DuFour — 2/8/2017
Dear Family & Friends,
It is with both a heavy and grateful heart that I write to inform you that Rick passed away peacefully at our home this morning after his long, hard-fought battle with cancer. We are deeply saddened that he’s no longer with us and yet so thankful that his pain and suffering are over.
It will come as no surprise to those of you who knew Rick that he donated his body to medical research. The Hospice staff cautioned us last week that sometimes bodies can be rejected for research if they are too emaciated, or suffer from other conditions. I just received a call a few moments ago assuring me that Rick’s body has been accepted. Leave it to Rick to conduct research, even after death…..always the teacher.
And speaking of teachers, Jeff Jones and our wonderful friends at Solution Tree have asked me to share the following link to a video they’ve created in memory of Rick – we hope you enjoy the tribute.
There are no words to express how much your comments, hearts, words of encouragement, and prayers have meant to Rick, me, and our entire family. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for walking with us on this journey.
With love and gratitude,
Becky
Needless to say, my heart sank. I couldn't believe what I was reading. I had learned so much from this man. He encompassed so much of what I believe in education. He literally changed the way we do business. I think many of us have been able to meet Rick at a PLC Institute. He sat with us many times during work sessions, some of us have been able to dance during Love Train with him at an after party, and all of us have been impacted by his teaching. I look at my bookshelf, and so many of the books are written by or cowritten by Rick DuFour. One of his latest books, In Praise of American Educators, needs to be read by our new Secretary of Education.
Since reading Becky's post, I have thought a great deal about the work we do at Parma. I have thought about my conversations with Rick and Becky. I can remember a time I had emailed Becky, and she responded with a phone number to call her as she and Rick would be in an airport for awhile. I was able to talk to both of them for clarification and advice. I remember that every conversation or email or encounter with him he always came back to the mission of High Levels of Learning for ALL students. He believed that the only way this was possible is for the school community to work as a Professional Learning Community.
His passing has made me step back and look at our work as a PLC. Are we implementing with fidelity? Are our PLC meetings focusing on the right work? Are we using data to guide our discussions? Do we have a safe environment that allows us to be vulnerable and share and receive help? Do we learn from each other's strengths? Please think about this the next time you sit down with your grade level to meet. What are you bringing to the meeting? Is your focus on student achievement? Are you working as a Group or a Team with your colleagues?
Please take time to watch the video link in Becky's post. It is a beautiful tribute to Rick. It is important to me that we do this work, his work in a way that makes all the difference for our kids and honors this man I respect so much. Please read one of his last posts from fall. Even in his battle, he was growing, learning and changing and talking about what that entails. My favorite line is: "My point is just that in order to bring about changes in my practice I had to engage in new experiences, which required new behaviors, which often required a re-examination of my assumptions." The lesson for us, we have to be willing to try new things in order to continue growing and learning.
Journal entry by Rick Dufour — 11/30/2016
My oncologist greeted me today with words that were music to my ears – “Your CT scan shows no growth of the cancer cells.” There is additional fluid that has surrounded my left lung, but he doesn’t see that as a cause of grave concern yet. So the good news is, I will remain in the trial for at least another two months. Thanks to all of you petitioning heaven on my behalf.
In an earlier post I cited Victor Frankl, a survivor of the concentration camp at Auschwitz, who wrote, “between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is the power to choose a response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.” I believe he was absolutely right, and that we can choose our response to a difficult situation. I would add that choosing a different response often requires a willingness to change one’s perspective.
For example, for 65 years of my life I have never opted to take a nap unless I was really sick. When I did try to sleep in the afternoon because I was ill, I almost always woke up feeling worse. Furthermore, napping seemed frivolous in light of all the things on my professional “to do” list.
For approximately a year now I have taken a different perspective on naps, and I look forward to taking one each day. I rationalize that my body needs time to rest and if I could fall asleep it was one way to avoid the chronic pain. I am now an unapologetic advocate for naps. Naps can be dandy! But changing my response to the idea of napping meant I had to change my perspective on the potential benefits of naps.
I tried to watch what I ate as an adult. That meant when I went to a fast food restaurant that listed the calories of different entrees, I read the menu from right to left. The more calories, the less likely I was to order it to avoid becoming heavy. I found myself continuing this practice until a few months ago. Even though my concern over gaining weight had disappeared due to my cancer, I was still reading menus right to left out of habit. Today, I look first at what looks good, and second which choice has the most calories. But it took me a while to overcome an old habit and approach food and caloric intake from a different perspective.
Ever since the time I was a teenager, I understood that one of the obligations of being a man was to drive the car (while his spouse or girlfriend helps by pointing out the speed limit or directing where the man should park). I apparently thought good driving required just the right amount of testosterone which eliminated women from the good driving pool.
But since I have been put on some powerful painkillers, I have been advised not to drive. So for months now, Becky has taken me everywhere in the car.
I have had to evolve on this one. At first I resented giving up driving because I felt somehow disempowered. Soon I began to see my being a passenger as a good thing. I could get work done, or I could just snooze. And did I mention that I have come to love naps? Even a nap in a car beats a day with no naps. I think I may have Becky sign on as an Uber driver with one client – me.
A reader of this blog might conclude that as the cancer has caused me to abandon certain assumptions, Becky has had to take on more and more. My response to that is, “you are absolutely right.” It is my good fortune to have married someone who is fluent in the 5 languages of love (a book I would recommend). One of those languages of love is the language of acts of service, or devotion. Becky is never happier than when she is doing something for others, so if our current trends continue, she should be euphoric by the end of the year.
My point is just that in order to bring about changes in my practice I had to engage in new experiences, which required new behaviors, which often required a re-examination of my assumptions.
I truly believe most people act in good faith, that new actions expand your experience and your perceptions, and expanded experience and perception can change one’s view of the world. It has for me,
I’m happy to end this message as I started it –no new growth of any cancer cells!! Thanks to all of you pulling for me.
Sincerest thanks,
Rick
Rick's last post was written on January 8th, exactly one month to the post written by Becky. Rick ended that post with these words: Your support has been amazing as well, and I hope it will continue. I’m extremely grateful to all of you who are taking this journey with me. I feel like your ongoing support lightens my load, and I can certainly use all the help I can get.
We have lost one of the best in our field. I am hopeful that we will think about what we have learned from Rick and Becky DuFour.....perhaps most importantly the importance of working as a team and always being willing to learn and grow in order to reach high levels of achievement for ALL!
